This is

This is life
dancing in the street
her skirt billows and 
hair flies
feet lighter than air
her dress like the morning sky

This is their day
ignoring the world
his hand guides her and
laughs

This is what it looks like
to live
to love

2004

The first waves of the 2004 Indian Ocean Tsunami, which killed over 200,000 people, hit the shore.

I was in second grade when this happened. It was the first time I remember understanding that something bad had happened. I only vaguely remember 9/11. We stayed home from school and my mom seemed slower and slept a lot more. I didn't understand why, but even though I liked skipping school, this seemed different. And I guess I was too young to understand. I think it was from then on that I came to realize that not everything is happy and simple. That thought was like a little cloud following a little ways off. I couldn't see it exactly, but I knew it was there.

I first heard about the tsunami at school. Rountree Elementary was raising money to help rebuild, and they even interviewed my little sister about it. But, she didn't really understand either. Our school was on the news, and they played all the interview videos. Apparently, there was a kid who used to go to Roundtree who moved back before the tsunami hit. I'd never met him, but I'd seen him around and he seemed nice enough.

I remember worrying about these strangers so far away. I asked why a lot. "Why are there tsunamis if they kill people? Why do bad things happen? And why am I so sad?" I guess that's when I started to know that I couldn't control everything about the world. And I know I can't control everything, but that doesn't mean I'm okay with it.

Photo Hunt

If this thing is so surprised, imagine how I feel! This is my bathtub! #scrubadubdub

I'd like to be a little more like F. Scott Fitzgerald. He stayed with Zelda even after she went crazy. #truelove

I've seen this everyday for four years. How did it get there? #realquestions

Man, this guy. He's great. I admire his ability to grin and bear it, and to make others smile. #goals #makesmesmile

This dude will always remind me of Kickapoo and the really dangerous stairs #abs #motivation

A child who is close to the ground would definitely notice this metallic piece of history. #nostalgia #leadpoisoning

Oh Dorian. You once were so pure. And now you are dead. #nevergrowup #19thcenturyproblems

ew. Looking for change under the vending machine cause, y'know #collegedebt and I stumbled upon this little guy left for dead. #thisbugsme

Something square? I am no square #impromptuselfie

I think the reason this little courtyard is so pretty is because we aren't allowed in it. #springhassprung

From atop the stairs the exhausted senior waits. Ready to steal the life-force of an unknowing freshman #stalkingbutnotreally

This is sensei. We've done a lot in four years, and she's taught me a lot about different things. #myschoolmom

Graffiti. Vandalism is bad, but it can be entertaining think of what possessed someone to write on the wall. What was their motivation? What does it mean? Is it a secret code? #modernart #justdudesbeingbros

Library card catalog. Sadly, there's no more call cards, but the cupboard is still a beautiful piece of furniture. #aunatural

This came out blurry, but so are the memories. Oh my god, we were such gross nerds. #weebs

101 Things

1.       My birthday is July 8^th, 1997. So my zodiac is cancer the crab, my birthstone is ruby, and I was born in the year of the ox.
2.       I like being the only one awake in the mornings.
3.       Groups of teenagers in public make me anxious.
4.       I passes out in class last year.
5.       I got bit by a brown recluse spider two summers ago, and it took me months to fully recuperate.
6.       I am low-key obsessed with Elijah Wood’s voice and laugh.
7.       Monkey faces freak me out. Especially baby monkeys.
8.       A rule I’ve always had is that I have to wait until it stops raining to do laundry or shower.
9.       I love old dishes and flatware.
10.   My hands are my favorite part of me.
11.   I don’t like gum.
12.   I used to want to be an embalmer.
13.   My ‘stage’ name would be Maddie Kentwood.
14.   I was not named after the dog mentioned in 13.
15.   I think The Book Thief is the saddest book I’ve ever read. It is so good.
16.   I hate the taste of milk, but have it with cereal anyway.
17.   I’ve convinced myself that I am a reincarnation of Oscar Wilde.
18.   Abraham Lincoln is my favorite president because he has an adorable personality.
19.   When my sister was about four years old she had a loose tooth. I told to put a towel in her mouth and I’d pull her around, but instead I yanked it hard and her tooth went flying. I do not regret my actions that day.
20.   My favorite dinosaur is the Apatosaurus. (It’s not a brontosaurus.)
21.   I never has one of those phases where kids only draw horses and wolves. I drew waterfalls and Apatosauruses.
22.   Only recently have I learned how to securely tie my shoe laces.
23.   I hate it when people use watermarked pictures in PowerPoints. What’s worse is when it’s an icon sized image, but they blow it up for the background and it’s a big blurry Stock Photo mess.
24.   Uptown Kids was probably the worst preschool I had ever gone to. It’s since been shut down J
25.   There are distinct differences between brands of ketchup, and Heinz is so much better than Hunt’s.
26.   Team Coke. Pepsi is nasty.
27.   I remember the first time I read Twilight I wanted to be as cool and mysterious as Edward Cullen. Then I reread it a few years later and I realized how moody he was.
28.   I think Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart deeply regret filming Twilight and I hope they recover from it.
29.  Someday I want to have a pet lizard. But I don’t know if I’d be able to feed him bugs without squirming.
30.  My favorite sweet tea is the kind from Popeye’s.
31.  My mbti is ISFP.
32. I really enjoy formatting word documents.
33. Strangers used to think that my mom dyed my hair when I was a little.
34. Squidward is my favorite Spongebob character
35. Colin Creevey is my favorite Harry Potter character.
36. I am very particular about the condition of my books, and who can read them.
37.  My favorite color is gray.
38. I can do college algebra and geometry, but I can’t do simple math without a calculator to make sure.
39. I don’t think I want to have kids.
40. I’ve already mentally graduated from high school.
41.  I once fixed a leaky faucet and I was so proud. But then it started leaking again.
42. The best museum I’ve ever been to was the atomic bomb museum in Hiroshima, Japan.
43. I’ve won the Japanese Club costume contest two years in a row.
44.  I used to want to own a burger restaurant when I was five and call it Madison’s Burgers.
45. I think it would be really cool to own a used book store with cats everywhere. I’d be the best little old lady with shawls and silver hair in an old book store.
46. Truth be told, I really don’t like steampunk.
47. The way I learned how to work a VCR is that I would watch Rapunzel nonstop and my parents got sick of setting it up and rewinding it for me, so I figured it out on my own.
48.  I used to want to be a paleontologist, but when I found out that most of the work is in the sweltering heat, I dropped that idea.
49. When whole families where camo together, I get a little nauseous.
50. I don’t know why but I really like to go grocery shopping.
51. Sometimes I’m funny.
52. Once I put grapes in my sister’s shoes and forgot about it. So when she finally found them she said, “DID YOU PUT RAISINS IN MY SHOE??” And I was no, that wasn’t me, I put grapes in your shoe.” Our dad appreciated the humor so I didn’t get in trouble.
53. One summer I discovered my sister’s Danny Phantom shrine and I still haven’t recovered.
54. My favorite town is Eureka Springs, Arkansas. I like their magic crystal shops.
55. I really hate it when people walk around while eating bananas.
56. The weirdest thing I’ve eaten was octopus shavings that were still moving. It was so good though.
57. During recess in elementary school, my friends and I would look for rocks and dig in the dirt. For some reason there was a ton of quartz and amethyst around and I still have a lot of it.
58. Every time I see a spider I want to throw up.
59. My sister, uncle, and I all have the same birthmark on our back.
60. I used to want to be a voice actor.
61. I think it would be cool to become a script writer for cartoons.
62. I am 5’8½”.
63. Nearly every summer our family goes canoeing. We weren’t able to go last year, but with this summer being my longest, I’m really looking forward to it.
64. I watch reality tv so that I know that I’m more sophisticated than those women who cause drama for no reason.
65. My favorite reality show was Here Comes Honey Boo Boo because no one was catty.
66. Right now, my mom and I watch Little Women: LA. Oh my god, it’s crazy.
67. On our way to Japan out of Springfield, we first went to San Diego and Pentatonix was on the plane. The bass singer was sitting pretty close to us so we were talking about it in Japanese. We got pictures while he was sleeping. Then, during our layover, we found out that he spoke fluent Japanese and could understand everything we were saying.
68. The first and only time I’ve been sledding I got a burn across my face from sliding into the ground. I vowed to never sled again.
69. I’m either really good at Blackjack, or I keep playing bad players.
70. I won’t eat blue icing.
71. I’ve always hated gel pens.
72. and jelly shoes.
73. I prefer red seedless grapes.
74. I would love to see how Oscar Wilde would react to the 21^st century.
75. I think people who don’t believe in the high possibility of alien life shouldn’t be trusted and are scared of unknowns.
76. I can hula hoop for hours.
77. At the Strafford drive-through zoo, the van got chased by a camel while we were hosting two exchange students for the day.
78. I can believe that I can’t believe it’s not butter is not butter.
79. In the Everglades I held a baby alligator and it peed on me.
80. In kindergarten, I held a baby hummingbird at the Nature Center and it peed on me.
81. I held a baby chicken for biology class and it peed on me.
82. I’d totally marry into money.
83. When I watch Jeopardy! I shout out the answers. My high score is 12.
84. My high score on flappy bird is 12.
85. In first grade, I painted a picture of a scarecrow for art class. I forgot to put my name on the back before I painted it, so I painted my name on the scarecrow’s arm. And because of that, my teacher got really mad at me, but then it got picked to
86. I can’t eat raw tomatoes or tomato chunks.
87. If I had my own country, it’d be called Viviana and I’d be the Quing which is both King and Queen.
88. I once took a quiz that said I belonged in Revolutionary War France, and I could totally see it.
89. I hope that in 2020, we can relive the Roaring 20s. (Without the market crash)
90. I hate birds.
91. But birds are the descendants of dinosaurs so I have to give them some respect.
92. I probably watch too much tv.
93. When I was in kindergarten, I wanted an imaginary friend so bad but I was disappointed that I wasn’t actually hallucinating to see it.
94. There was about a month when I was 5 where I would hallucinate. I woke up thinking there was something in my bed so I pulled the covers off and there was a snake. I tried to get out of my bed (which was the top bunk) but there was another snake on the ladder. I jumped and woke up on the floor.
95. I swallowed a nickel once.
96. My parents said that the doctor told them they were having a boy when they were pregnant with me, and they were going to name me Harrison Dean Huffman.
97. I would have gone by Dean because he’s a character in The Iron Giant.
98. But Harrison Ford is also a really cool guy. So I could have gone by either name.
99. I feel that Harry Potter is really ditzy and Hermione is the one who kept him alive for seven years.
100. Lemonade used to give me heartburn, but now it doesn’t.
101. This assignment made me realize how hard it is to pick individual things about myself. I simultaneously feel like I know so much and so little about myself.

Lyric Shuffle

Dust and Dross

It's old and sitting in the corner
From pawn shop to grandfather to dad to me
I condemned it
Three strings bend law and flirt with the floor
the others are so far out of tune
they'd snap
if I tried to set them back
The thought grabs me however sudden
I should clean it up
and string it up new
revoke the banishment and let it prove itself
But I didn't
It's just an old guitar
And no one wants to play it

Hopper Painting

Day in and

                day out

Lovely weeds tumble through

Gas for their cars that

                fly fast east

Few and

                far between

Bulbs buzz and paint peels

Roasted peanuts wait

                in their little bags

Hours turn

                days

Fumes pass the time

and chip the paint

                blown to the wind

Darkness

                looms

Birds don’t pass here

No one turns west

                where the sun dies

I stand

                vigil

For the day that

                something comes

The old man looks up from his scrawls and scribbles, unsure if he has heard something.

“Theodore,” the young man says again. He’s usually visibly flustered when he comes into the station. But today, he looks more nervous than ruffled.

“What is it?” Theodore lightly closes his journal and pushes it to the side.

“You know, we’ve been working together a long time. And I-- I consider you part of the family.” He started fiddling with the buttons on his vest. Theodore holds his tongue and doesn’t mention that he’s been working the station since before the boy was born. “And regretfully I must ask you… to retire.”

Slowly and with a smile he shakes his head. “You know I can’t do that.” Theodore grips his book and replies, “I can’t leave this place; It’d fall to pieces without me.”

“That’s…the point. We’re starting demolition next Monday. You have until then to come to terms with it.”

                Theodore knew that he’d be asked to retire sooner or later, but he’s held onto the shred of reason that he’d be able to return and visit. When he was alone at the station, he felt as if he had his own little slice of the world, expansive in its own.